Boo! Hahaha, I had enjoyable wanting by way of my CT scan photographs and took this screenshot as a result of it regarded fairly creepy (these eyeballs!).
I understand how uncool it was to put up about my biopsy after which take two weeks to share the outcomes! I felt just like the outcomes took eternally. For the reason that biopsy was on Friday, I hoped the outcomes could be out there on Monday; Tuesday on the newest. Often, labs and exams are uploaded to my chart on-line inside 24 hours or so.
By Wednesday, I nonetheless did not have the outcomes. I referred to as the ENT doc who’d ordered the biopsy and was advised that the physician needed to go over them in individual. And that he was going to be out for per week, so the earliest out there appointment could be on the twenty second! Listening to that, in fact, I ready myself for unhealthy information.Â
In the meantime, I had been leaping by way of all of the hoops to get an appointment on the College of Michigan medical heart, which could be very tough to get into; it is an enormous instructing hospital. (The lady from scheduling that I spoke with even had my biopsy outcomes however wasn’t allowed to provide them to me.) I requested my major care physician to fax my referral and data (I used to be shocked that individuals nonetheless fax issues…) and she or he did it immediately. Then I needed to await the scheduler to name me to set the appointment with the ENT (otolaryngology; “ear/nostril/throat”) division. I lastly bought an appointment for the twenty fourth (yesterday).Â
I used to be nonetheless ready on take a look at outcomes, and I simply could not wait anymore. I do not know why I did not ask within the first place, however I contacted my major care doc once more and requested if she had the outcomes and was she capable of add them. Inside an hour, they had been in my chart. (My physician is the BEST at doing the whole lot shortly.)
Anyway, the outcome was that my mass is benign! Which is clearly nice information. Nonetheless, nevertheless, this mass is inflicting me a variety of discomfort–especially after the biopsy. The biopsy made my signs a lot worse and I have been tremendous irritable. I consistently really feel like my shirt is choking me, however after I attain to tug the collar from my neck, it is not there–it’s simply this mass that’s inflicting the strangling feeling.
The CT that was taken within the emergency room the day of my biopsy confirmed that the mass had elevated by a few centimeter (it was about 5.5 and now it is about 6.5 cm–that’s *very* massive). Since I had the appointment at U of M, I had entry to their affected person portal. My CT scan was in there, and I used to be completely fascinated wanting by way of the pictures. It is like watching a video touring by way of your physique, one aircraft at a time, and there are photographs from a number of directions–traveling from the entrance of my face to the again of my head, and from all sides touring by way of to the opposite facet, and even beginning at my lungs, shifting as much as the highest of my head. You possibly can see the whole lot in 3D.)
Based mostly on the physician’s notes and the pictures, it confirmed that my trachea and esophagus had been being pushed to the facet because of the mass urgent towards them–this is why I’ve issue swallowing and what’s inflicting the strangling feeling. It is pushing my carotid artery towards my again. It is even touching my backbone, and goes down previous my clavicle (collar bone). Needles to say, it is very massive. I knew it could want to come back out, however I hoped that I might save my proper thyroid with the intention to *attempt to* keep away from needing hormone substitute remedy for the remainder of my life.
*I should still want it, it’s going to rely on my thyroid perform after surgical procedure*
Right here is a picture that exhibits from the entrance to the back–the pink line is my airway, which ought to be straight up and down. And the blue circles the mass itself.
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| CT of thyroid mass, circled in blue |
My appointment at U of M yesterday didn’t begin out nicely. I do know most individuals will assume that is shallow, however I’ve written earlier than about how I’m having such a tough time with displaying indicators of getting old. You might bear in mind when, in 2018(?), Jerry and I went to the lab for him to have his blood drawn and I used to be with him. I sat down within the ready room and he went as much as the counter to test in. The lady there noticed his license/birthdate and exclaimed how younger he regarded and mentioned these phrases which nonetheless hang-out me: “I assumed that was your mom with you!”
Up till that second, I by no means considered myself as wanting previous. However that triggered one thing within me that made me discover the whole lot about myself that’s displaying indicators of getting old. Do I actually appear like I could possibly be 60-ish+ years previous?! Even when Jerry regarded MUCH younger–let’s say 30 (he is 44)–that would imply I might must look roughly 50 (in the present day I turned 43). I began to really feel extraordinarily self-conscious of my age at that time, though I by no means cared in any respect earlier than. Is not it silly how one single remark from somebody has the ability to try this? Most individuals would in all probability giggle about it, but it surely had the alternative impact on me.
Anyway, again to my appointment yesterday. The medical assistant introduced us again to weigh me and get my blood strain. He requested me, “Is that this your son with you?”
My face bought actually scorching and my ears instantly began ringing. I used to be so flustered I could not even reply him, and Jerry, figuring out I used to be crushed, helped alleviate the awkwardness I felt by making a joke concerning the fountain of youth or one thing. The medical assistant requested for my birthday and after I advised him, he mentioned, “Completely happy early birthday!”. I mentioned, in what I hoped got here off as nonchalant, “Thanks, however I am immediately feeling very previous”. I type of needed to trace to him that as an alternative of asking if it was my son, simply ask who’s with me in the present day or one thing like that.Â
I assumed he would apologize, however he did not catch on. I can bear in mind being (comparatively) younger and by no means understanding why age was such a sensitive topic for ladies. Once I labored at Curves in my 20’s, a lot of the ladies had been within the 40 to 60-ish age vary and often talked about aging–I simply did not get it. I by no means thought I might care about getting old! And I truthfully would not thoughts it, if I assumed I regarded my age–43–but 60+?! That is onerous to swallow. (Fairly actually proper now, haha). When it was only one one that talked about it, it could possibly be written off as a one-off unintentionally impolite remark; however when two folks say it, nicely…Â
Okay, sufficient of that. I used to be pleasantly shocked on the minimal wait time, which was superior. The ENT physician was extremely advisable by my cousin, who’s a nurse practitioner there, and she or he was the whole lot I hoped. She was extraordinarily pleasant and affected person, taking the time to reply my questions and clarify the whole lot rather well. An anesthesiology med pupil was along with her and he was simply as nice.
They needed to scope my throat, which wasn’t enjoyable (on the earlier ENT doc’s workplace, they did it as nicely). They put a protracted, skinny, versatile tube with a digital camera on one finish, by way of my nostril and down my throat to have a look at my vocal cords. It actually appears like a COVID take a look at, solely like pushing the swab all over to stab your mind. Then it felt like I had a tablet caught in my throat. However my vocal cords aren’t broken; the change in my voice is probably going as a result of my trachea (airway) is being pushed apart by the mass on my thyroid. (My voice has gotten type of raspy and it is a pressure to speak.)
They agreed that the mass ought to come out, and the physician defined the surgical procedure to me. It is underneath basic anesthesia, which is extra difficult than the IV sedation I had not too long ago for my tooth extraction, however I have been underneath 3 times before–for my two jaw restore surgical procedures and for my pores and skin removing surgery–so I am not too nervous about it. The scariest half is that they will be working in a really vital space of my body–around my airway, my esophagus, my carotid arteries, jugular veins, and vocal cords–and there are dangers with that. However the ENT physician is the one who can be performing the surgical procedure and I really feel very assured in her.
Once I was tremendous nervous concerning the basic anesthesia earlier than getting my jaw restore, my surgeon (who was an ENT doc) advised me this: In case you’re nervous about your airway throughout surgical procedure, one of the best group you may have with you is an ENT group. In order that’s comforting! Haha.
The surgical procedure sounds very straight-forward and I will be allowed to go away the identical day (she mentioned three hours or so). For per week post-op, I have to relaxation, not elevate something over 10 kilos, eat comfortable meals for a few days, and that is about it. There may be a variety of follow-up lab work to see if my thyroid hormones tank. They’re utterly regular proper now, so I’m hoping my proper thyroid will just do high-quality when the left is gone. The ENT doc mentioned that it occurs in about half of sufferers with this process.
Now, I simply have to attend for a name from the scheduler to get a date for surgical procedure. The physician mentioned that since it is not most cancers, I haven’t got to do it proper away–just every time it is handy for me–but I will take the primary out there date. My signs are driving me loopy, particularly since my biopsy.
Haha! Talking of, after my biopsy I used to be advised that I “might need a small bruise that ought to go away by itself in a few days”. It’s now 15 days later, and that is what it seems to be like:
Except for the bruise, although, the lump could be very noticeable in my neck. It wasn’t like this earlier than the biopsy. This mass grew SO shortly. I seen someday within the summer–I believe August–that my neck regarded a bit larger in entrance. I forgot about it after I bought COVID, after which the headache that lasted two months, and the method that led to my tooth extraction.
It was nonetheless barely noticeable in December, however now there isn’t any means you may miss it. I am nervous it’s going to proceed to develop at this price. I am thrilled that it is not most cancers, though I knew I might be having surgical procedure both means, but it surely’s so uncomfortable–I can not await it to be gone!
